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red album

by r0wan is a L0ser

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1.
change 03:39
music is dead have millenials killed that industry yet? don't listen to what they've said they're just lazy fucks with messed up heads don't try to stop the pain keep going on with your dated brain nop\ special snowflakes remain 'cause we're comfortable, hiding from the face of change cell phones are killing our youth how dare these machines show them the truth why don't they just listen to you? oh, honey honey, if you only knew remember: knowledge is shame bring it all back to the good old days keep yourself in your cage 'cause we're terrified, fucking terrified of change no one wants to be left behind i know, i know it's scary losing your mind hard to believe you'll be fine 'cause the world is moving too fast, not enough time but we won't ever be tamed we'll move the world forward, and no one is safe try to stop our vicious reign or embrace something beautiful; stare into the face of change
2.
i'm trying so hard to keep a grip on my heart but it just feels impossible to just keep holding on surviving is an art it's a beautiful day saturated in grey there's a melancholy undertone that just keeps holding on and the happy goes away i'm not gonna lie i feel so lonely tonight i'd rather be hurt, impaled with a dagger made of words at this point i wouldn't mind i want to live that lovely lie i want to see with sparkling eyes
3.
drive 03:22
honey just drive till we find something new carry your corpse till you feel alive there's nothing to lose honey just drive LET'S GO every day i'm just standing still what can i do but wait? when can i eat and sleep and feel the thrill? it's driving me insane let's drive in the rain let's drive through the pain let's drive (x2) honey just drive blast The Cure too loud tell me your secrets and i'll tell you mine till someone lets us out honey just drive (x3) drive, drive, drive, drive honey just drive (x4) HONEY JUST DRIVE drive honey just drive
4.
at the end of the day i'm just a loser i could daydream my life away but at the end of the day i'm just a loser tell me why i just wanna be okay i just want them to notice me to love this huge catastrophe but no at the end of the day i'm just a loser i could daydream my life away but at the end of the day i'm still a loser tell me why i just wanna be okay i know you always notice me but it still stings babe, endlessly oh well maybe one day i won't be a loser it'll be in my dreams as i sleep it all away but at the end of the day i'm still a loser tell me why i just wanna be okay
5.
void 04:14
you know, they say there's a difference between distraction and happiness well i would say that's true but i'd still like to be distracted soon you know, they say there's a difference between ignorance and innocence well i would say that's true it's not what you know, it's what you do i thought i'd be happy but it got so much worse oh, it's really saddening i guess i need something to hurt (x2) it doesn't make much difference if i'm at school or sleeping in tell me that's not true at least someone is loving you would it make any difference if i never showed my face again? i don't know what to do at least someone is loving you i thought i'd be happy but it got so much worse oh, it's really saddening i guess i need something to hurt (x2) it hurts, but this time it's impossible to avoid i feel like i'm staring at a void i feel like my insides are just a void could i just go to sleep inside the void? you know they say there's a difference between distraction and happiness well i would say that's true but it all circles back to you can my distraction please be you?
6.
babe 03:28
hey babe i can't wait to see you again oh babe i would kill to hold your hand yeah babe i'm thinking of you all the time ooh babe you're always on my mind babe you make me feel so good inside babe stomach full of butterflies yes babe you give me a heart attack for the record you're not getting your sweater back ooh babe ooh my babe ooh ooh babe i can't stop thinking of yesterday yeah babe i will never be the same with your hands on my body and your lips on mine i can't breathe it feels so nice oh babe let's do that again sometime ooh babe ooh my babe ooh ooh (x2)
7.
the end 02:14
"babe" that's what i called you all the time, but things have changed it doesn't matter anyway; there is no cure my heart is nothing now but shards and bloody gore but i don't care anymore why did it have to end this way? you didn't wanna hurt me but you hurt me anyway so bye for now (x4) you cried you said you weren't in a good mental space, which was a lie you didn't want me in your life, now you need space you said that we could still be friends, but that's okay i don't want that now anyway have all the space you need i'll wave to you from another galaxy so bye, the end you won't see me again you're sorry but that doesn't really matter to me
8.
W I T C H 04:30
it's the witching hour unleash your inner power come on, don't be scared feel the spirits in the air i'll be your dark witch any day of the week i'll do your tarot card readings at lunch; save me a seat i'll be hanginng around drawing pentacles on my shoes i know i'm batshit crazy but it doesn't concern you i'll shift your whole reality can't you feel that energy you're not here to please society cant you feel that energy? can't you feel that energy? (x6) come with me or not we're going to where all the bodies rot hold my hand if you're scared feel the spirits in the air i'll be your dark witch any day of the week i'll do your tarot card readings at lunch; save me a seat i'll be hanginng around drawing pentacles on my shoes i know i'm batshit crazy but it doesn't concern you i'll shift your whole reality can't you feel that energy you're not here to please society cant you feel that energy? can't you feel that energy? (x4) can't you feel that energy? (x4)

about

a collection of songs i wrote and recorded when i was 13. i was really sad and lonely and my favorite color was red, hence the name of the album.

i've improved my musical skills a lot since then, and it's a bit hard to listen to some of these, but i figured they're still worth salvaging, so i'd drop them off here.

DISCLAIMER: i am a trans man. my voice sounds really feminine in these recordings but please don't comment on it and please use my preferred pronouns (he/him).

cover was photographed and edited myself.

thank you. i love you all. enjoy!

-rowan

credits

released July 29, 2020

written, recorded, and produced by r0wan is a L0ser.

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r0wan is a L0ser New Hampshire

i make penis music

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